During the last month or so, there have been several events in which I finally realized I was angry about. Not just perplexed, frustrated or mad, but full blown anger. What does one do with full blown anger? Especially as a child of God? For many years, I didn’t even acknowledge that I felt angry. I stuffed it! Can anyone relate? It isn’t the healthiest way to live life. And then I let myself feel it and was more destructive than I wanted. Finding a balance hasn’t been easy, but it’s the only way to live. Sometimes it takes a while to realize how I feel. And then depending on the event, it may take a lot of wrestling to move from anger to peace.
Moving from anger to peace as a child of God can be unsettling and uncomfortable. I have found myself in the last few weeks, asking questions. Why am I so angry about this situation that didn’t go as I thought it was going to go? Did I not hear Abba Father right about the situation? It seemed 99.9% sure it was going to go one direction, but because of the decision of one person it went another. It seemed unfair and I became angry. Why was I so angry? I kept asking Abba. Finally I heard, “You feel your voice and others wasn’t heard.” Whoa. Ok. What a revelation. That made sense and helped me to understand why I was feeling full blown anger.
So now what?
Ok, I feel like my voice wasn’t heard so what else? Again, I kept asking Abba. I also heard, “You are not accepting the situation as it is and that you can’t change the situation.” Well, that was true as that wasn’t the way it was to be. But I knew from past situations, that I wouldn’t be able to move forward and from anger to peace unless I was able to accept the outcome. Being stuck isn’t a good place, and I remember that from the past. I didn’t like it and still don’t like it as it has affected not just me, but a lot of good people who also find themselves angry. So, as I was navigating from full blown anger to peace, I had to let go and let Abba.
Control is an Illusion
Also, I heard, “You are trying to control the situation, and it isn’t your situation. Let it go.” I wanted to control the outcome as I didn’t like the outcome as it was. But again from past events, I knew I had to let go of what I thought should have been the outcome and give it to Abba. You see, control is really an illusion. We don’t have control over much except our emotions and our reactions to what happens. I can’t change the outcome. Sometimes, it seems that I have lots of control over situations, and that is when I find myself in a place of anger and frustration, because I really don’t have any control. So with much mourning and working through the grief, I have been letting go.
Forgiveness: Anger to Peace
In the midst of letting go, forgiveness has been the key. Forgiveness isn’t forgetting what happened, but letting go of my hold on the situation and allowing Abba to work in the situation. Over the years, I learned that by not forgiving, then I’m the one being strangled and poisoned. This again isn’t a healthy place for anyone. Living tied to others in this manner doesn’t bring peace or joy, instead, it brings heartache, resentment and bitterness.
After watching a resentful family member years ago, I decided I wasn’t going to live that way. It is a struggle sometimes, as I understand it is a more passive way to deal with others. And sometimes, it is difficult to let go. However, I have come to realize that I don’t want to give someone else my peace and joy. So, I ask Abba to forgive them, to forgive me and I also forgive Abba as I realize many times, I am angry at Him as well.
From Anger to Peace and Love
Even though forgiveness is given, feelings can still take awhile to follow. Don’t think that the forgiveness isn’t working. Keep walking in the freedom of knowing that you are moving and walking from anger to peace and joy. Deep down I know in my spirit and gut that I have peace even though it doesn’t feel that way at times. Abba knows and Holy Spirit will keep reminding you of who you are, a child of God and the Most High King!
Peace and love and joy are fruit of the Holy Spirit and are ours! No one can take them away from us, unless we let them. So, I know there are other events going on in our world and in my own life that doesn’t seem to be the case. However, we have a choice to allow peace and joy and love to reign in our hearts. Let’s do some soul searching and decide to choose to move from anger to peace, love and joy! Will you join me?
Until next time,
Keep learning and growing!